"Rest" Room

Police in North Bergen used bolt cutters to free a 61-year-old man who was, police say, drunk and who somehow found himself locked in portable toilet recently.

According to published reports, the man was in the "Johnny on the Spot" toilet for an indeterminate period of time, perhaps overnight.

The porta-potty was locked for transport around 7:40 a.m by Department of Public Works employees who were cleaning up the morning after the annual Winter Fest Parade.

Minutes later, a pedestrian walking nearby heard a call for help from the porta-potty. Police, Rescue and Fire officials responded to the scene.

It was reported that the township is now instructing employees that they are supposed to open the door and look inside, before padlocking a porta-potty.

Good idea.

Urine Trouble, Fella!

As most people know, urinating in public is against the law. Urinating on a police car in public is not only against the law, it is also colossally dumb.

In the wee hours of November 26, police in Hackettstown had responded to an incident along Main Street when they observed a 20-year-old man relieving himself on the police car.

The act earned the guy an arrest and a pending court appearance.

Tunnel Vision

Recently, a dance troupe from Florida was late for a television appearance in Manhattan, stuck in traffic at the New Jersey entrance to the Lincoln Tunnel.

So, rather that sit there, they decided to run through the tunnel on foot.

There were only two problems with this: Foot traffic is prohibited in the tunnel, and the dancers were in their costumes... camouflage costumes.

As a result, Port Authority police wearing their own costumes -- uniforms and guns – interrupted the spontaneous sprint.

But the quote of the month comes from the choreographer for the group. He was quoted as saying that he had no idea there was a problem with running through the Lincoln Tunnel.

"I am from Florida. We don't have tunnels," he said. "Apparently we couldn't do that."

IDs at NJSLM in AC

On November 16-17-18, representatives from The Badge Company of New Jersey will again have a display at the New Jersey State League of Municipalities’ annual conference in the Atlantic City Convention Center. Stop by booth #240 and say hello.

This is the 95th – 95th! – annual conference. We haven’t been participating since the beginning, but we have been there for more than 30 years.

This year, in addition to seeing our regular display of public safety badges, you’ll see our available non-police badges. Photo ID badges, proximity cards, access cards, visitor badges, and more.

We can make these badges for you or we can provide you with a complete system to make your own ID badges in-house, great for new hires, for student populations, and similar ongoing needs.

It’s part of what we’re doing to ensure that, whatever your needs, "We’ve Got Your Badge."

So come check us out in booth #240. Complete conference and exhibit information is available on the NJLM web site, http://www.njslom.org.

The Hapless Burglar

So, let’s say that you are a burglar. You break into homes and steal things. What’s your biggest concern? Getting caught.

Which explains why a burglar took off running when two patrolmen stopped him for questioning on the street in a North Jersey town recently following a reported break-in.

He ran a block or two, vaulted a fence, and hid under a blue tarp covering a boat in a backyard.

However, it is unlikely that he could have chosen a less suitable hiding place. First, the dog that lived at the house began barking at him. Second, the dog’s owner was at home. Third, the dog’s owner was a police captain in that town.

The burglar was taken into custody.

The dog, somewhat ironically named Bandit, was given a hero’s treatment in the local news. But, really, he was just being a dog. And the burglar was just being another dumb crook.

Little Trees, Big Charges

No matter how many of those little tree-shaped air fresheners you put in your car, there are certain odors that they cannot mask.

In our hometown recently, police stopped a car for a registration violation. The officer observed a unusually high number of air fresheners in the car. The officer’s nose then told him that the odor of raw marijuana was in the car as well. At this point, the officer called upon a trained nose – that of a drug detection dog.

The dog found just over three-quarters of a pound of marijuana, sequestered under the rear seat. The driver now faces several drug charges in addition to the original vehicle registration charge.

Lost in Translation

A friend of The Badge Company of New Jersey is an attorney, working often on cases where his client reads, speaks, and understands only Spanish. In these instances a Spanish-language interpreter is assigned to the case.

After a recent court appearance he was sharing an elevator with the interpreter. Making small talk, he asked her if she was a native speaker. She said yes. He then inquired, "Where are you from originally, if I may ask?"

"The Bronx," she replied.